I went to see my psych today, mainly to talk about my self esteem, which seems to have been sinking lower and lower for a while now.
I tend to not see the good in myself and be way too hard on myself. I'm not kind to myself. In fact I can be downright nasty to myself in my head.
As I have trouble finding good things about myself, I've been tasked with writing down when someone says something nice to me, or when something positive happens. I'm hoping to turn my negative self talk into realising that there are good things about myself. Which yeah, I know, I've talked about already on this blog, but I really need to absorb it, to accept it.
Today my psych told me it was awesome that I went to Queensland and back. And it is. And you know what, it's made changes in my life already, that drive, even as unpleasant as it was at times. On the weekend B and I went into the city to the IMAX theatre in Darling Harbour. The drive in, which normally I would have avoided like the plague, was much easier for having done the much bigger drive to Queensland. We went the M2, the Lane Cove Tunnel and the Gore Hill freeway, all of which I have had trouble with in the past. I won't say there was no fear, but there were no panic attacks, and the anxiety was down to a workable level.